Don't Get the Hat Wet
by Lauren Wagner
Summary: Rating for character whipping: Set before the first movie with a faint hint of the third this is how I figure Pintel and Ragetti would agree to mutiny against Jack Sparrow.


One blue eye the same shade as the ocean on a clear day stared up at him in terror, tears slowly starting to form and slide down one narrowed cheek.

Captain Jack Sparrow was not moved however; in fact he was very pissed at the moment as he glared down at the offending member of his crew.

Ragetti was currently on his knees in front of his captain; bare-chested with his green jacket and maroon shirt having been torn from his body and tossed off to the side somewhere. His arms were spread out; a long pole resting across his shoulders and his wrists bound to either end of it.

To the side Pintel could be heard shouting and cursing at Jack in anger, protesting against the upcoming punishment.

"Do you know how important a man's hat is?" Jack asked Ragetti calmly, swaying slightly as if he were drunk.

"I…I didn' mean ta…"

Suddenly Jack whipped his hat out from behind his back and he struck Ragetti across the face with it. It was currently sopping wet; a few seaweed pieces stuck on it.

Ragetti whimpered softly, his chest heaving as his heart started to race. For a moment he risked a look over his shoulder and another whimper escaped him when he saw Bo'sun standing behind him, tying knots into the whip he was holding.

"Et's not bloody fair!" Pintel was raging, Gibbs and Bootstrap Bill holding the smaller man back. "Ye know 'e didn' mean et! Ye know the lad's clumsy!"

"I am the judge about people's actions on this ship and it clearly states in the articles that you all signed that my hat is off limits to any kind of damage!" Jack suddenly raged, roughly putting his wet hat back onto his head, growling softly at how wet it felt on him.

The entire crew was watching this, surprised by the anger burning inside of Jack. He was always relaxed and often seemed drunk as a skunk to them all, but something as small as his hat getting wet had put him on the deep end and Ragetti was unfortunately going to be the one to feel the pain for that.

Off to the side Barbossa leaned against the railing, taking a bite out of a green apple. A small smile played on his lips for a moment and he caught the eyes of a few of the crew who were forced to look away when Jack suddenly revealed a cat-o-nine with each strap knotted down to the handle.

This is going to be easier than I thought. Barbossa thought to himself with a soft chuckle as Bo'sun and Jack both raised up their whips and Ragetti's wail rang out as both his bared chest and back were whipped bloody.

Pintel's screams were almost as loud as Ragetti's and soon enough a few more crew members were forced to jump in and hold the man back as he tried to draw his pistol and put a bullet into their captain.

Ragetti had nowhere to go on his knees with his arms bound the way they were and each blow sent him either backwards or forwards, making him yelp as the next blow sent him in the opposite direction.

Soon enough his screaming died down to pained moans and whimpers and for a moment he was about to lose consciousness when Bo'sun stopped whipping his back and merely held him up by his grimy hair, gripping it tightly in his fingers as Jack continued his assault on his narrow chest, giving his hair a good twist whenever he thought that Ragetti was going to pass out.

"Never. Get. My. Hat. Damaged! Ever!" Jack was shouting down at him now, ending each shouted word with a blow from the cat.

Ragetti was coherent for a few more blows after that, feeling the blood from the cuts slid down his stomach to stain the top of his pants until everything was black and blissfully painless.

His wooden eye fell from his eye socket then, bouncing a few times before rolling away; only to be snatched up by Barbossa's little monkey; who then scampered away before anyone could catch him.

Earlier That Day:

Ragetti and Pintel as usual had been placed on mop duty on the deck again and as usual; Ragetti was singing as he worked; despite Pintel's protests that he couldn't sing.

"Ta welcome ole Rosin the Bow. Ta welcome ole Rosin the Bow. Ta welcome ole Rosin the Bow. An' I know tha' good quarters is waitin'. Ta welcome ole Rosin the Bow!"

"If I've tol' ye once I've tol' ye a thousan' toimes!" Pintel growled as he turned on his partner in crime. "Ye can' sing! An' yer name's not Rosin the Bow!"

Ragetti stopped singing with a pout, turning to look at Pintel.

"Oy, wot's wrong wif 'ow I sing?" he demanded, his hands resting on his hips as his wooden eye rolled around lazily in the socket. "I loik tha' song!"

"Aye, I do too!" Pintel agreed. "But not when yer the one singin' et!"

Ragetti put on an injured air and he then sniffed for a moment, looking around for a moment before he then tilted his head to indicate where their captain and Gibbs were standing off to the side, looking over the railing at something through a telescope.

"I'm sure the captain don' mind a liddle singin'!" he said. Pintel rolled his eyes and he shook his head for a moment.

"If ye star' singin' 'e's loikly ta cram yer eye down yer throat ta keep yer quiet!" he warned him.

Ragetti blushed when his newly acquired wooden eye was mentioned and he placed the palm of his hand over it for a moment. He had lost his eye a few weeks ago to some Naval officer who was quick with the blade. Surprisingly enough; it was Barbossa who gave it to him, warning that he should keep the eye safe.

"At leas' 'e won' mention et." He huffed as he headed over. Pintel sighed and stopped his mopping.

"Oy, come on! Don' be a baby!" he called after him.

Ragetti ignored him and with a huff he calmly started to mop around near where Gibbs and Jack were talking about where they should be heading.

"When I'm dead an' laid out on the counter. A voice ye will 'ear from below. Sayin' 'Send down a 'ogshead o' whiskey. Ta drink wif ole Rosin the Bow'." He sang softly to himself, not paying attention to Jack or Gibbs or Barbossa's little monkey who was calmly walking over to start some mischief.

Jack and Gibbs were currently in the middle of an argument over where they should head next, which caused Jack to get a bit excited; making him swing his arms around more violently than was usual.

Ragetti was in his own little world as he both mopped the floor and sang softly to himself and so he did not notice when he soon stepped into arm range as he calmly continued his mopping.

"And I think that we should go that way!" Jack said, his right arm shooting back for emphasis.

His hand struck Ragetti upside the head, causing his eye to pop out of his socket with a pop.

"Me eye!" Ragetti cried out and he dove forward to get it when the monkey suddenly ran up and snatched it away.

"Ye liddle bastar'!" Ragetti growled. "Give et 'ere naow!" he demanded.

"What is the problem here, Ragetti?" Jack demanded, ignoring the fact that he had been the one to cause this in the first place.

The monkey screeched happily and bounded off to rest on the railing behind Jack now.

"'e took me eye an' 'e won' give et back!" Ragetti whined softly as he pointed an accusing finger at the monkey.

Jack rolled his eyes and calmly blew a dreadlock out of his face for a moment as he turned on the monkey.

"Hand over that orb." He ordered, holding out a hand calmly as he put on a serious air.

The monkey seemed to smile and he calmly held the eye out as if to drop it into the ocean below.

"Me eye!" Ragetti screamed and he dove forward then, accidentally shoving Jack to the side as the monkey leapt away and he caught his eye.

With a sigh of relief Ragetti smiled and popped his eye lovingly back into its rightful place before he then turned to Jack with a smile.

"Et almos' wen' in." he said, oblivious to the look on Jack's face. He then frowned and blinked for a moment, tilting his head to one side. "Where's yer 'at?" he asked dully.

Jack said nothing, trembling in rage as he glared at the dull one-eyed pirate.

"Rags…" Gibbs said softly and the younger pirate looked at the old storyteller with a confused look still on his face.

"Aye?"

"Look over the side."

Ragetti blinked in confusion before he did so and the color drained from his face at the sight.

Jack's hat had fallen overboard and was currently floating on the waves.

With a gulp he looked back at Jack and he found himself facing a drawn cutlass.

"Get back my hat!" Jack ordered angrily. "Now!"

Ragetti had never seen the captain this furious before and his adams apple was soon bopping up and down as he whimpered.

"Bu'…I can' swim…" he pointed out meekly. Jack narrowed his eyes angrily and in a sudden flash of movement he shoved Ragetti over the side.

"Then it's time you learn!" he growled after him, watching the young man sputter and scream in fright. "Don't forget me hat!" he added angrily.

"Captain!" Jack looked up at Gibbs calmly.

"Yes?"

"Ye've never acted like this before." He pointed out. "And ye know the lad didn't mean it."

Jack snorted for a moment and he then thought as more of the crew ran over to see who was screaming and why.

"Rags!" Pintel shouted in horror.

"Go and get him." Jack ordered simply. "But make sure you get my hat too!" he added angrily.

Present:

"Come on, lad! Wake up so I know yer alive!"

When Jack was done beating him, he had simply left Ragetti lying on the deck; his chest and back bleeding badly as his arms were still bound to the pole across his shoulders.

Pintel had wasted no time running over to his best mate, untying his arms and trying to see if he was all right or not. He gently cradled his head in his arms as he knelt down over him, brushing the hair from his eyes and frowning at the missing eye.

"Rags? Rags, come on mate!" he pleaded softly.

"Mmm…'urts…" Ragetti moaned softly, unable to open his eye much less breathe at the moment from the pain lancing throughout his entire body.

"Come on, lad." Pintel said sadly as he tried to help him up. "I'll git ye inside…"

"Oh God!" Pain lanced down his back as Pintel touched him and Ragetti arched his back and cried out in pain.

Pintel winced at his friend's scream and sighed sadly.

"Wot else can I do, mate?" he said. "I need ta git ye inside!"

"Jesus…Please help me, Lord…" Ragetti whimpered softly. Pintel bit the insides of his cheeks for a moment in worry. Ragetti wasn't really the picture of a good Christian, but whenever he used the Lord's name like that…Pintel always knew he was serious and even though he would often chastise the younger man for trying to read the Bible and quote something from it; this time he said nothing.

"I can help ye get him inside."

Pintel looked up and blinked in surprise as Barbossa smiled down at the two of them and crouched down for a moment, a look of genuine concern on his face.

"Wot?"

"I can take a hold of his legs and ye can hold onto his shoulders. It will still hurt…but not as much as it would with just ye dragging him along, savvy?"

Pintel nodded and smiled for a moment as he looked down at Ragetti who was currently whispering the Lord's Prayer fervently, messing up most of the words along the way.

"Thanks, mate." He said finally. Barbossa smiled as he took a hold of Ragetti's ankles.

"No problem." He said.

Despite the fact that they were as gentle as possible; Ragetti still screamed in agony, begging God and Jesus to help him all the way down. He was soon brought back to their quarters and he was gently placed on his side on the cot that he shared with Pintel.

"Ye stay down here with him." Barbossa instructed. "I've got something for the pain and I think me monkey stole his eye."

Pintel gently arranged it so that he could still gently cradle Ragetti's head in his arms and he nodded a bit, running his fingers through his hair for a moment.

"Than' ye kindly fer the 'elp, Barbossa." Barbossa merely nodded and left as a wicked smile escaped as he climbed the steps.

"Jesus…" Ragetti whimpered.

Pintel let that one slide for once and he merely stroked the younger pirate's cheek for a moment, waiting for Barbossa to come back.

"I…I didn' mean ta git 'is 'at wet…" Ragetti whimpered as his body trembled badly now.

"Hush, lad." Pintel comforted him. "I know ye didn'. Jus' don' try ta talk righ' naow all righ'?"

"Et 'urts…"

"I know."

Ragetti stared off into the distance for a moment, and slowly he raised up a hand to his face and he whimpered.

"Me eye…s'gone…" he said sadly.

"Barbossa said 'e was goin' ta git et fer ye." Pintel said. "Naow keep quiet." He admonished him gently.

Ragetti's hand fell back down and he sighed softly as he stared at the wall in silence.

"The water…et 'urt." He said softly. Pintel looked down at him and was going to tell him once more to keep quiet when he gave up and merely moved a lock of grimy hair away from the empty eye socket.

"Yer missin' eye?" he asked.

"Aye, the salt 'urt et real bad." He said sadly. "But I still got tha' 'at back didn' I?" he asked.

"Aye, so ye did."

"Pinters?"

"Aye, Rags?"

"Why did 'e beat me? 'e's never done tha' afore."

"It's because our dear captain has become corrupt with power; as all wicked men put in charge do from time to time." Barbossa said simply, walking over. In one hand he held two fresh green apples and in the other he held a brown bottle. His monkey was sitting on his shoulder, Ragetti's eye held in his hands.

He smiled at them for a moment as Ragetti slowly looked up at him and he frowned at the monkey.

"I would like to apologize for me monkey's mischief causing you so much pain." Barbossa said at once, holding out the two apples as a peace offering. "I've all ready told him to stop taking your eye, mate."

Pintel looked at the offered apples with a cocked eyebrow. Although fruit was rare on a pirate ship, it was highly valued due to its defense against scurvy. On the Black Pearl, only the captain Jack and his first mate Barbossa were allowed to even look at the fruit, let alone eat it.

"I doubt your friend will be able to get up for a while, and our captain has all ready given us orders not to feed him if he can't get up and work. These should tide him over until he gets better." Barbossa explained.

Pintel smiled at this offer for his friend and he promptly took the apples and hid them under their blankets where Ragetti could reach them without hurting himself further.

"Me eye?" Ragetti asked.

"How could I forget?" Barbossa said as he calmly took it from his monkey and gently popped it into place for the younger pirate. "Better?"

"Aye."

"Now...This medicine here needs to be rubbed into the wounds for it to work. Three times a day it needs to be applied." He explained as he handed over the bottle.

Pintel took the bottle with a nod before he then looked at Barbossa questioningly.

"Wot ye said afore…about the captain…Ye've got a plan don' ye?" he asked with a cocked eyebrow.

"And what makes you say that?" Barbossa asked innocently.

"Givin' away apples an' medicine ta someone beaten by the captain? Ye mus' 'ave somethin' else ta say ta us." Pintel pointed out.

A small smile came to Barbossa as he nodded and then leaned in closer to whisper.

"Our captain has been acting cruelly towards us lately." He said. "Look at what he did to poor Ragetti here for getting a bloody hat wet! I says we need a new captain around here…"

"An' tha' new captain is ye then?" Ragetti asked suddenly, still staring at the wall.

"I would never do what he did to you." Barbossa said calmly. "I would be a fair captain to everyone on this ship."

"Ye wan' us ta mutiny wif ye then?" Pintel asked with a smile that showed off rotting teeth.

"When the time is right…yes." Barbossa nodded.

"I'm in." Ragetti said suddenly and for a moment Pintel looked down at his young friend in surprise before he then nodded and looked back up at Barbossa.

"Ye 'eard the lad." He said simply. Barbossa nodded and he then straightened up.

"Once the lad there gets better, I'm sure I'll have the rest of the crew on our side." He assured them. "Until then…just wait and see, aye?"

"Aye." Pintel nodded.

"Good man." Barbossa nodded in approval and with that he left and headed back on deck.

His monkey looked over at him for a moment and screeched and Barbossa threw back his head and laughed.

"I told you those two would be easy." He said simply. "All you had to do was steal the idiot's eye and the rest would work out by itself! With that little display of torture, the rest of the crew is sure to follow me!"

Down below Pintel was applying the medicine to Ragetti's wounds, whispering words of comfort as Ragetti soon slipped into a much more peaceful slumber.

As he slept, a single tear fell down from his empty eye socket.


End file.
